Luigi Bastardo

Guaranteed to give you a bore-gasm.

A highly-enjoyable family adventure flick about a group of dirty stinkin’ hippies.

A surprisingly song-less song-and-dance film with Leslie Caron and Mel Ferrer.

The first Bill & Ted in High-Def? Why, in time, we’ll be dancing in the streets all night!

When is this series going to make a right turn? Oh, ask a silly question…

There’s really nothing new under the sun here except for some old, brittle, sun-bleached Bones.

More fodder for my ever-worsening mental condition.

Lesson learned: never accept a gift from Sean Penn.

Any actor who shares the same name as my deodorant is A-OK in my book.

As God said to Cain: “If you want to cast people into the deepest depths of despair, send in a couple of French folks.”

A movie that doesn’t live up to its title: I don’t like these people at all!

A wonderful set containing timeless theme songs and intense incidental music as well.

This shark is even more dangerous roaming the aisles of a grocery store than I am.

Wake me up when October ends.

Casting Vincent Price as a “good guy” action hero is a sure sign of drug use itself.

A cheapo horror film gets an equally cheapo DVD release.

Just like Frankie, Elvis, and Sid, Timothy Dalton did it his way.

Ashton Kutcher is given the unenviable task of stepping in to fill Charlie Sheen’s cocaine-stained shoes; and he immediately starts winning.

Criterion brings us the lost fairy-tale romance from Paul Fejos, along with two other Fejos curiosities.

Once again, ABC has taken a routine movie formula and turned it into an overlong TV series.

007 goes toe-to-toe with Star Wars, and the result is nothing short of amusing.

The last major peplum flick from the director of the original Hercules.

Five years. Three films. One ass-kicking elderly star.

No, it’s not another documentary on Ron Jeremy. Thank God.

From Roy Rogers to Jonah Hill, and from Willem Dafoe to Seann William Scott: who makes the grade?

For fans only. The rest of us tuned out long ago.

An enjoyable, exploitative throwback to Mel Gibson’s cinematic past.

The lost forerunner to the more-delightful Frankie Avalon days of AIP.

Ever wonder where both Bernard Fox and Ken Adam got their start?

Julia Roberts delivers yet another god-awful performance in this abysmal comedy.

I’m not sure if I’m supposed to love it or loathe it.

Luigi Bastardo takes a look at six recent Blu-ray releases guaranteed to either delight or degrade.

The man who captured Eichmann before Arliss Howard.

Keye Luke’s elevation to the character of Charlie Chan hits DVD via the Warner Archive.

Another enjoyably bad brain-dead b-western from Monogram Pictures.

If you love classic noir, this is a must-have.

A taut World War II drama from the studio that dripped blood.

An enjoyable B-Movie that fires real bullets and shells.

A serious contender for Worst Film of 2012.

Don’t you mean “Badass”? You’re talking about a putrid heinder otherwise!

An excellent example of what happens when an above-average story is shipped off to the B-Unit department.

A lousy show, but a great presentation.

Robert Downey, Jr. and Guy Ritchie should take notes.

How do you get into a World War II flick when someone says “A’ight”?

It takes a little man to accomplish a big feat. Or something like that.

A low-budget prison drama from Amicus Productions’ Max Rosenberg and Milton Subotsky.

There’s magic out there. Well, maybe not in this series.